Enlightenment

Photo by:  D Sharon Pruitt

This morning I started something I've been wanting to do for a while - meditate.  I was up extra early to take TD No. 1 to work and came home to such peaceful surrounds, I thought the time was right.  After familiarising myself with techniques on Google, away I went.

I decided sitting on the deck was the perfect place to proceed.  Not quiet, but peaceful with the sounds of waking birds (and a little traffic, but that's okay).  As I closed my eyes, I began to concentrate on my breathing...

10 seconds in - the cat next door screeched, followed by the dog barking...

11 seconds in - "Now just relax"...

30 seconds in - I begin to smell sea air and am picturing myself cross-legged on the beach, watching the sunrise.

35 seconds in - "Stop frowning and relax"...

40 seconds in - "Oh, hurry up, hurry up - relax and become enlightened"...

This self-talk continued for what seemed like an eternity but was actually only a few seconds and what I was really beginning to notice was my habitual feeling of being rushed.  That any minute now, someone was going to wake and find me - disturb my unskilled meditation practices.  Not just that, but that it was urgent that I get it done, there were things I had to do.  Actually, I didn't have anything to do - I had nothing imperitive that needed my attention - this is just the way I always feel.  Rushed.

After about three minutes or so, I noticed my breathing became slower, my thoughts were fewer and my mind became lighter.  After five minutes, I slowly began to open my eyes, which seemed to be such an effort.  I felt like I'd been asleep.  I felt refreshed.  How hard it was for me to sit still and relax for just five minutes!